這一代家長都有個通病，就是對孩子有over protection(過分的呵護)的傾向。Brandie Weikle在專欄中有這樣的觀察：
      You don't need to be on a playground for long before you hear the choruses of "Good job" and "Careful!"
      只要花點時間到公園的遊樂場，家長的心態就一目了然。Choruses是此起比彼落的呼聲。那是家長們不斷對孩子說︰“做得好”和“小心”！前者的用意是鼓勵，後者就是擔心孩子受傷。
      Yes, ours is a generation of parents fully indoctrinated in the powers of both healthy self-esteem and a complete set of elbow and shin pads.
      Healthy self-esteem是健康的自尊心，elbow and shin pads是護肘護脛的軟墊。這一代父母都被“洗腦”(indoctrinated)，認為這兩件事對孩子最重要的。這也怪不得家長：
      And can you blame us? We're presented with so much information not only on our child's secure sense of self(有安全感的自我感覺), but on how to parent, how not to parent and the various toxins(毒素), predators(捕獵者) and superbugs(超級細菌) that threaten our children's wellbeing every day.
      但這樣的心態結果往往是over protection。出發點是希望孩子開心，卻容易忘記了要孩子長大後能幹獨立(competent and independent)，也是非常重要。而要達到這個目標，途中受些挫折，經歷不開心，是必經之路。
      流行歌詞“小小苦楚等於激勵”是有道理的。套用於教育孩子也是正確的。要孩子獨立自信，成為"resilient child"，有從挫折中恢復的能力，這中間有幾個重點。American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP, 美國小兒科學會)，列出培育孩子resilience的七大要素，稱為"the 7 C's of Resilience"。

        抗逆7C
      居首是Competence(能力)︰
      Everyone needs to have something they're good at, which is why competence is the first pillar of resilience.
      每個人都希望自己有些強項。家長可以跟孩子做一些他們真正喜歡又做得到的活動。
      Confidence(自信)︰
      The next step is having confidence in one's abilities. It's not enough just to be good at something; you have to get a chance to prove to yourself what you can do.
      讓孩子獨立做一些事情，不要每步去扶他們。
      Connection(人際關係)︰
      Close ties to family, friends, school and community provide kids with an important sense of security(安全感) and shared values.
      Character(人格)，是指是非對錯的觀念︰
      A fundamental(基本的) sense of right and wrong helps children make wise choices, contribute to the world and become stable adults.
      Contribution(貢獻)︰
      Children who have the opportunity to make a connection between their actions and the betterment of others are more likely to make altruistic(無私的) choices.
      讓孩子學會幫助別人。
      Coping(應付問題)︰人生當然不會一帆風順。要孩子長大成為開心的人就要他們學會應付問題、解決問題。
      最後是Control(控制)，指的是自控，控制請自己的情緒和衝動行為︰
      自覺過分緊張(paranoid)的家長，應該讀Christie Barnes的The Paranoid Parents Guide: Worry Less, Parent Better, and Raise a Resilient Child。